by Bob Jackson

first published in October 1995 Valley Striders News
  1. The par time is 25 mins, plus 15 secs for each year of your age.
  2. Add 10 secs for every mile per week that you are training less than 25 m.p.w. (under-trained). But also add 10 secs for every mile per week that you are training more than 35 mpw (over—tired)
  3. Subtract 30 secs if your last serious training run was on Tues/Wednesday, add 30 secs if it was more than a week ago.
  4. Add 20 secs if you stayed up to watch "Match of the Day".
  5. Add a further 20 secs if Aston Villa were on and they lost. (This would be 30 secs if you’re a Leeds United supporter, because you’re not as used to losing)
  6. Subtract 20 secs if you had no alcohol the evening before; add 40 secs per mile for each pint of beer or glass of wine over one.
  7. Add 10 secs if the fish and chips were from the Wetherby Whaler; add 1 minute if they were from Greasy Joe’s.
  8. Add 5 secs for every time the cat jumped on your head while you were sleeping.
  9. Subtract 15 secs if you arrived at the start with ˝hour to spare; add 30 secs if you only had 10 minutes to spare. (JW add 10 minutes if you were 10 minutes late)
  10. Subtract 10 secs if one of the wimin is 100-200 yards ahead. (Ladies, subtract 10 secs if Peter Lambert is just ahead)

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